Imaginative Rival Mugs

'My imaginary playmate can whip your imaginary playmate!'

"He loves his leaf blower."

Genius Envy

'Oh yeah, your dad might be on 4-1 in this afternoon's race, but mine is on 3-1!'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'Stamp collecting has gotten more competitive.'

The Sculptor

'Your imagination was so powerful he became real. It happens to me all the time.'

Plane with banner shoots at another.

"I carefully examine the data for March madness brackets and every year I lose to Anita, who picks by uniform colors."

Using the skill of pottery to make athletics trophy.

"@#!!!%$ the critics!! Give me Bobby $#@!! Flay!!"

I'm not just jumping on the bed. I'm perfecting bedspring-cusion calasthentics!

'You're an interesting combination of shallow and thick.'

Knight of the sandcastle.

'What're you doing, kid? You keep spoiling my surprise!'

Tug the Toggle

'Knock it off, you two. This is why I hate double dating.'

Interpretive marathon

"When you're finished not looking at here, can you divert your non-attention to me?"

"All As. What did you get?"

"It's a note from Eddie's teacher. It seems he's stretched his imagination past the end of her rope."

'Oi! Take your eyes off 'im - he's my bitch!'

Chess bowling.

You throw poop like a girl.

"It's not winning I enjoy so much. It's beating you."

I know you are, but what am I? Huh? Whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you. I'm ready for the return of school. My mom says you're just jealous.

Sorry, Bob, but the hive voted to go with Barb's blueprint again this year.

War artists.

Oh, stop trying to impress the witness with all your fancy legal mumbo jumbo, your honor. I saw her first!

"You heard the lady, buddy - she already has legal representation!"

'He's just messing with your mind.'

Sports for slipper wearers.

'They're not a swimming aid - they're my feet !'

Having been banned from playing with toy guns, Billy improvises.