Humor-in-healing Fan Pillows

Psychiatrist gag

Self help acupuncture

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

'The funny part is that the aerial was fine -- the TV set was just unplugged!'

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

"You need the toilet. . . hang on I think I've got an app for that."

'I only got up for a drink of water, and a queue's formed next to my bed.'

Dr. Flagg's Worst Nightmare

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

"I'm referring you to an old gypsy woman."

"'CPD'...stuff and nonsense, the old ways are fine for me, now pass me a hammer. I need to put this patient out!"

'I think it's your colon. I came to that conclusion through the process of elimination.'

'Thyme heals all wounds.'

I don't care what happened on ER. This doctor patient relationship is not going to descend into unbridled passion.

"Yes, I have seen people in worse health than you. But, they were all dead."

"If I don't think it's going to work, will it still work?"

Obstetrics.

'I'd like to be fed intravenously. I've heard about your hospital food!'

Reflex Testing -"...and you're sure you can't feel it"

Oh, oh... I detect traces of tree nuts... where's my epipen?

"Sorry Mr Penrose. We forgot to shake your medicine this morning."

'Doctor, I thought I was the one who was supposed to say Ahh.'

'If that doesn't work, nothing will.'

NHS Trust Hospital: Management Team/Medical Staff

"Actually, I didn't become dizzy and nauseous until I started inhaling the scent strips in the waiting room magazines."

'Mrs. Tomkins says her prescription has no side effects, so it can't be doing her any good.'

General Hospital sign.

"Let the healing begin!"

"Don't think of them as fleas. Think of them as your entourage!"

"And then I said 'Don't worry, this is perfectly safe!' Ha, ha!"

"Jazz fusion, modern country or my podcast - my podcast it is!"

Hi, my name's Pam and I'll be your paramedic for the evening.