Humor Appreciation Pillows

The end is near. Are we nearly there yet?

Room for one more...

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'Yeah, I hate change, too.'

Print media strikes back.

'Don't mention carrot cake. He had a bad experience.'

'Your thesis on 'how to keep warm in winter'? Interesting.'

The Water Diviner

"It's people like you, young man, who ruin it for everyone else!"

'I've just heard the weather forecast, they say it could be hot...on the other hand it could be cold!'

In case of broken glass, break glass.

"..and you'll also need Percy here, his interpreter"

Hard to Reach Books.

'Too much hazel, not enough nut.'

Skunk in library reads from the '10 Best Smellers'.

'He would have wanted it this way.'

"Boss, can you check the address again? I have a bad feeling about this one."

'What are you complaining about. My glass is only half-full too.'

'I'm bored.'

"Nice finish everyone. Let's just bow in place because I think we are stuck."

Basset Hound.

'This new cat is good.'

"We would like a room with a mirage view."

'...And now, this Surgeon-General's warning: 'Look out, you fools!''

"Hi! I'm on a hippo."

Aggression/Security

"Wake up, Jane! There's a giant talking squirrel at the end of your bed!"

"I like watching birds. Sometimes I wonder if I could fly, who would I crap on?"

Blabbing

Rex Turgid, Secret Swinger

"Maybe he just wanted his own space."

'This is the fourth single woman to attack the Valentine's display this week.'

Kid with dog pool toy reads sign at swimming pool saying 'No dogs allowed'.

Today's memoir is more of a who dunit?

Duckumentary: 'QUACK!'