Humor Appreciation Pillows

The end is near. Are we nearly there yet?

Room for one more...

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'Yeah, I hate change, too.'

Print media strikes back.

'Don't mention carrot cake. He had a bad experience.'

'Your thesis on 'how to keep warm in winter'? Interesting.'

"It's people like you, young man, who ruin it for everyone else!"

The Water Diviner

In case of broken glass, break glass.

'I've just heard the weather forecast, they say it could be hot...on the other hand it could be cold!'

Hard to Reach Books.

"..and you'll also need Percy here, his interpreter"

"Nice finish everyone. Let's just bow in place because I think we are stuck."

'I'm bored.'

Basset Hound.

'This new cat is good.'

'What are you complaining about. My glass is only half-full too.'

"Boss, can you check the address again? I have a bad feeling about this one."

'He would have wanted it this way.'

Skunk in library reads from the '10 Best Smellers'.

"We would like a room with a mirage view."

Today's memoir is more of a who dunit?

Duckumentary: 'QUACK!'

Kid with dog pool toy reads sign at swimming pool saying 'No dogs allowed'.

'...And now, this Surgeon-General's warning: 'Look out, you fools!''

"Today's special is we'll pull the plug on the jukebox if someone else's music annoys you."

"Hi! I'm on a hippo."

"Gesundheit."

Aggression/Security

"You know all the best pubs for lunch, Seamus."

"Maybe he just wanted his own space."

"I like watching birds. Sometimes I wonder if I could fly, who would I crap on?"

Blabbing

Rex Turgid, Secret Swinger