Household Expense Strategist Mugs

"He's something new. Our phone bill now has a monthly stub perforation fee."

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Will work for ETFs

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

'Change is inevitable, espeically when you have a newborn in diapers."

'You have to reconcile your gross habits with your net income.'

Investing your savings

"Hey, honey, the credit card company increased our debt... I mean our credit limit!"

"Expense account or regular?"

'Greenspan said today the alert staus for the possible interest rate has been reduced from orange to yellow.'

Lemonade - $500 A Glass! 'Yes, my prices high, but how else am I supposed to buy a Boulevart M109R? Certainly not on my allowance.'

"Did you get my e-mail about who takes out the trash today?"

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

Keep the econoimy moving

Man breaks piggy bank to find another smaller piggy bank inside.

"The time has come for some tough cost-cutting decisions, and I'm forced to ask myself, do we really need a bass?"

"Good news. Your medical prognosis is right in sync with your retirement portfolio."

Screwdriver labelled 'Buyer' and screw labelled 'seller'.

"Well you said you wanted a simple, cheap solution!" (IT Solutions).

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

"Honey, I love celebrating Christmas! I love all the food, the sweets, the Christmas tree and the presents, but our bank account hates Christmas!"

Man feeding fish banks with money, not food.

'I don't need to know what it is when it's on sale.'

"I made my money the old fashioned way...a team of high priced lawyers litigating round the clock."

"And this financial plan is specifically designed for people who know their retirement -- IF they get one -- won't be half as good as their parents' retirement, and are really steamed about it!"

'These are tough times for wall street tycoons...the best we can do is laugh half-way to the banks.'

First United Church of Outrageously Overlimited Credit Card Holders

'Life, liberty & the pursuit of tax shelters.'

'It may seem we're sinking deeper into debt, but really we're just experiencing a quarter of negative growth.'

'Are you good with decimals? Our certificate of deposit is currently paying 0.025%.'

'I realize money can't buy happiness, so I'm just trying to improve the exchange rate.'

'I've begun spreading my wealth to offshore accounts.'