House Viewings Mugs

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

Tidy it up for the open house, and it wouldn't hurt to put out some freshly regurgitated worms. For sale.

"Homes on Holmes"

"A little baking soda will get rid of the smell.

Real Estate Personals

"Yes, Madame, Teletubbies."

'Now from this room you can get a great view of the whales going by!'

'What makes you think the basement leaks?'

"In this piece, the price clearly does not reflect what the artist is trying to say."

"It's like a tiny house, but bigger."

'They're playing house.'

'It's like having our own private luxury box in the game of life.'

'Don't worry. The first 30 years of being an inspector are the hardest.'

"You see a haunted house, I see a house with good bones."

'When did we lose our targeted audience status?'

'I think you'll all rest easy knowing this is a gated community!'

House for sale, appliances included (in the yard).

Tracey Emin - Private view.

UP Again: Housing Prices.

New Homes

"To be honest, we were thinking of something like a Cape Cod."

"Admittedly, it is a bit of a 'fixer upper'."

'Yes, there is a bidding war - but I'm almost certain you aren't allowed to take prisoners.'

Turtle Eviction

"It has tremendous possibilities."

"It's all about the freezer storage space for Vinny."

"You're going to love the 360 degree views with this one."

"This house comes with smart windows. They automatically open when my husband takes his shoes off."

Yes. This is definitely a house. The Housing Authority closes another tough case.

"Grandma is included in the purchase price."

Godfrey Hunting for Lodgings

"Did I mention it needed a little work?"

'Oh, look, honey - the master closet has a walk-in bedroom!'