House Renovation Pillows

"Can't we just get some load-bearing wallpaper?"

Spring Cleaning

'The kids just love doing paint by numbers.'

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

"I'm looking for something that will go nicely with this!"

'It's a self-build.'

"He's here to help install our new converter box."

Planning permission REFUSED...

Eggshell blue

"I bought an old screen from a movie theater for our entertainment room. Getting it in the door and down the stairs may be a challenge."

Fixing the light

'Yes,I am on call 24 hours,you called me 22 hours ago.'

'I think I've finally found a fixer-upper in your price range.'

"I'm overcome with emulsion!"

Skeleton Builder.

"Did we just paint the house or did it just paint us?!"

"What's my laptop. Your old room is now the computer room."

"Yup, looks like your bookcase is full. You might want to start thinking about getting a new one."

Hey Darlene, have you ever sued anyone for libel? Not yet. But it is on my bucket list. I've scheduled if for January 19th, 2032. Right after "visit Machu Picchu" and right before "renovate and flip a house." I firmly believe in planning ahead. I've got everything mapped out. Go ahead, try me. March 1st, 2075. Reincarnate as a level-24 mature soul.

It's the Ask Sadie Advice Hour. "Fed up in Flint," you're on. WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?! House of Java.net Cybercafe. I bought a dirt-cheap house in Flint, hoping to rent it out. I had it renovated, and then the day before our open-house, someone broke in and stole all our plumbing. So what?! In my day, nobody had plumbing! We did our business in a ditch down by the river and we were glad about it! List it as "vintage Americana" and quit yer complainin'! But they took the roof, too. In my day, a roof

"I'm just saying, it would have been nice to have an en suite at night."

"Hmmm. Not sure it will go with my wife."

"Look what we found yesterday when we were cleaning out the attic."

Let's get organized

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

Painting by the numbers for adults

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

'These elves sure are helpful around the house.'

'Good news. I found where the termites have been living.'

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

Painting the Ceiling