Homeopathy Enthusiast T-Shirts

"May I ask you, Miss Howre, what made you select a homeopathic attorney?"

What the Doctor Ordered

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

'Thyme heals all wounds.'

"Aren't you getting a little carried away with this herbal medicine, Doctor?"

'Cool it with the herbal shampoo -- you've got aphids.'

"How many more times, you've got hayfever, so no, you can't have any cannabis oil."

"When I was a little girl...my mami had really good remedies for our aches and pains."

"Okay, Jaxcsunn, stay still in the crystal circle while I douse you in essential oils."

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

Day 4 of self-isolation and the strain was showing.

'And so, Ladies and Germs, I conclude that we must promote homeopathy! This may be our best chance to wipe out the human race since the glory days of the Black Plague.'

Natural Medicines

'It appears to be a side effect of the herbal eye drops you're using.'

Ahh, Chicken Soup

Alternative medicine

"It's a new way to stretch leftovers. Saw it in Homeopathy Now."

"Sergio, we don't have to spend so much money on health insurance."

"Here, let me put some ointment on your bug bite. I made it myself from cayenne powder, licorice root and mugwort leaves blended with that vanilla pudding I made last week. Hmm...it's not here."

'Great job! -- I'll go gather some herbs.'

Akron, oh, you're on Ask Sadie. What's your problem?! I'm thinking of not signing up for health insurance this year. Good idea. In my day, there was no such thing as health insurance. If you got sick, you paid for it with either money or chickens. That's if you were a lily-livered coward who just had to see a doctor. When great-great-grandmother Cohen had her sixth heart attack, she just applied a poultice made of chestnut leaves and flour and kept on plowing.

"My Harvard Medical Guide says if a wisdom tooth is infected, you may need antibiotics and possibly have the tooth pulled by an oral surgeon."

"They say chicken soup is good for a cold."

Chicken soup is in an intravenous drip.

"Don't tell grandmom about your computer's virus. She'll just tell you to download chicken soup."

'I hope this alternative Chinese medicine works!'

-"For instance, this gin and tonic does not have a single molecule of gin in it!" -"It's from the staff canteen, right!"

'I was hoping you could fix it with homeopathy.'

'I'm trying homeopathcy, what are you trying?' 'Acupuncture!'

'Can you keep a secret? This particular remedy is illegal in 49 states.'

'It appears to be a side effect of those herbal eye drops you've been using.'

Chicken Soup

Fisherman to friend about to be devoured by shark: 'Bill, are you familiar with the health benefits of shark cartilage?'