Home Safety Enthusiasts Mugs

'Be careful running through the house. Mom installed speed bumps!'

'What do you mean we can't have custody of the children?'

'They say most accidents happen in your home.'

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"You've got termites. The good news is I gave them all little phones to keep their minds off doing any damage."

'It's good to see that you have a smoke detector...'

"I know it looks fine, but let's get an engineer's report and a termite inspection just to be on the safe side."

"Okay, what's your next, more expensive security system?"

'Throw it out. . . we never use it, unless you can think of someone that might need it.'

"I think he's outgrown the baby gate."

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"We've completely child-proofed our home."

"Peter quickly learns the limitations of his new hamster ball."

'Your father installed a security system.'

"Do screen doors just keep insects out, or other things too?"

Man carrying crates of eggs about to step on sleeping dog.

Santa hosing the Chimney.

'You can't beat the old style security systems!'

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

"My dad put in a new security system."

"Let's pick up our cars now, 'kay Puddin'?"

'New normal' family life

'I know the fire's in the kitchen, but that program just irks the hell out of me.'

"Maybe this is insignificant, what with everything going on in the world, but do we have a fire extinguisher?"

'You said to call back if the gas problem got worse.'

I tried insuring my house over the phone but they insisted on seeing it. It was on fire at the time...

'Nice to have a door opener.'

'I told you he was smart. He turned a potential hazard into a plaything.'

'Well those stair gates were a complete waste of money'

'I'm taking a poll. Do you feel safe in your own home?'

"Honey, your radon testing kit is here."

Beware the Dog

'I lost him in the house, but don't worry, a snake that big should be easy to find.'

'He's always on the heightened alert!'

'Is your house baby-proofed?'