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R. Wickert: Born at Home, Died at Home, Home Schooled. . .

The Tightrope Balancing Act of Home Ownership and Interest Rates.

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

Beware of the Dog Hair.

"I always thought of my childhood home as being larger."

'The upside is that if the water gets high enough all your termites might drown.'

Couch and Potato

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

'Hanging around the house, Fred, just in case.'

man juggling career, home and children

'They're playing house.'

"My biggest concern is adequate closet space."

"I'm going to make you a stay-at-home mom."

'Love your renovations.'

'It looked a lot bigger in the photos.'

"It's the first responders wondering when you'll be needing their services this weekend..."

"Not too big a garden-my wife tires easily!"

Real estate.

"It's a nice unit, but there may be a faint odor from the last tenant..." "Yeah, enough to make you faint."

"I'm going to put some shelves up, certain scenes may contain strong language."

Estate Agent Office

Cordless Drill and Drill Less Cords.

'I was looking for tile floors and more closet space, let's keep looking.'

Auctioneer of the Year: Edward Hammerhands.

'Want a new house? Time to start groveling again.'

'Check you house for termites, Lady?'

"Well, you know what they say...geo-location, geo-location, geo-location!"

"Well he's sweating, pale, and out of breath, but then again he's not used to being home doing the housework."

An occassional clean out should prevent unpleasant smells.

"My pappy built this shell with his bare claws. I'll be damned if some freeloader moves in."

"Why do we need a bigger house. Your folks can barely afford this one."

"I can't go out right now. It's cleaning day and my bucket list has a mop in it."

Castle Cat Flap

"This, 'being a housewife' lark, isn't so hard."