Home Equity Enthusiasts T-Shirts

Elderly couple sits in living room with wall sign that states: God Bless our Reverse Mortgage.

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

"But there's no way in hell I could afford Jupiter today."

'My interpretation is that it deals with the artist's utter frustration over the scarcity of remaining, reasonable equity values.'

Travellers with a developer: 'I see ski slopes.'

The stages of gentrification: a guide

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Of course, the rent on the fourth floor is considerably higher.

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

Somewhere in France: "I thought I was buying goat cheese. I endedup with a chateau in the Loire."

"A hole half this size sold for 340,000 acorns last week! No inspection!"

Do you like to talk about Real Estate? Like to meet other men and women who do? Dial the... REAL-ESTATE HOTLINE

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

'You may be the best man for the job, but I have a dozen women who are better qualified.'

'For Sale by Neighbor'

'Honey, it's the escrow people. They want to know if you could send a stool sample.'

One tends to the sick. The other manages a large estate. Interestingly, a caregiver and a caretaker are not on opposite sides of an interaction.

Got Rationality?

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

Real Estate Personals

"At last we own our own apartment. I feel like a king."

God bless our home equity line of credit.

A large bird house with many compartments; one is labeled "Sup't.".

Emigrating to France.

I'm buying a house. You're broke. So? the interest rate plans are amazing. The banks are giving money away. Besides, the housing market is going nuts. If I buy today, I can sell next year for a huge profit. I suddenly feel faint. You look ill, Mr. Powell.

'I told my wife to run the house like a business. So she sold it to an American corporation.'

"I couldn't keep up the payments."

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

'Commerical real estates' man excited by peak in sleeping 'Rental rates' monitor

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'