Holiday Humor Fanatic Mugs

'Sorry, Rudolph, we can't let you join in any reindeer games... You've tested positive for steroids.'

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

Elfie Stick

Piranhaclaus

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

Try me/try me/try me...

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

"I always forget how much louder they sound in the country."

"The eggnog fountain is a bad idea."

'Dang, again we're going so fast that we caused a disruption in the time-space continuum.'

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

"I think I preferred it before he became an equal-opportunity employer."

"I could get used to working remotely."

"And my client will be seeking significant damages for being mistakenly placed in the naughty column!"

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

Father Christmas Painting Robins.

'Looks like no Christmas bonus this year.'

'He's got your nose.'

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

'Maybe there is something in all this global warming stuff.'

"Could you help me fit nine days work into five and still see my family?"

"Then you just run a VLOOKUP against the Naughty column."

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

Santa's Helpers

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'