Holiday Aficionado Gifts

'The new hired hand said since it's Earth Day, he's going to give the earth a break and not plow today.'

'Finally lashed out and bought yourself a Stetch & Grow Smorgasborder for the holidays eh?'

"Can you go out and gather all the gifts you bought online? I'd like to use the front door."

Santa Claus's Mail

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

Christmas Tree

'He lives for his holidays.'

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

That one has all the batteries!

"Home depot."

"Just because I can deliver toys around the world in one night, doesn't mean I understand the tax code."

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

Children's Dreams on Christmas Eve

"I have no toys just yet. I have a concept of a plan for toys...toys like no one has ever seen before."

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

Horn of Leftovers

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

Happy Turkey Day!

'I've got no problem with December, but what do I blog about the rest of the year?'

'Okay, time to sleep now. Switch off your nose, Rudolph'!

'We would like an unspoiled paradise, but with lots of shops.'

'Ya gotta love the way this farmer gets into Halloween spirit.'

'I love all the seasons! Fall and winter have great holidays, and spring and summer school gets out!'

"There's gotta be a way to make money off this."

"What are you doing? It's Halloween. Not leaving your deliveries to the last minute this year?"

An Advance Visit From The Three Wise Men

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

'Wow! School's only been out for ten minutes, and I've already forgotten everything I learned.'

"Once upon a time there was a kind bank manager who found all the money lost in the global financial meltdown, brought world peace, stopped global warming, cured the common cold and discovered Julian Assange is Santa."

'Bye dear! I'll have another nice reindeer steak ready for you when you get back.'