Hipster Critic T-Shirts

"What really gets me is that he's always lecturing me on being 'woke'."

You want me to be a what? A hipster. My research shows caf

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

"I'll have a cup of coffee, and would you mind removing that ridiculous painting and turning off the Wilco?"

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

Emergency Hipster Beard

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

Old rocker.

Spontaneous Kombucha

Normal Beard vs. Hipster Beard

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

"As your new CEO, I hereby change 'deadline' to 'soft squiggle.'"

The Inventor of the Man Bun!

"Communion at the contemporary service is scones and coffee."

"Yo, how's it swinging?"

Gangsta wrap.

White Flight. Beautification. Gentrification. Plain Old Rich.

Woke Jersey Shore

'Dude, ya hat's on backwards.'

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

"I love blue Martinis. It's like the fifties and the nineties all mixed up together."

"I think you're beard needs a trim..."

"Give me something that shows I'm hip AND fiscally responsible."

A train's dining car is a diner.

Unlike modern day hipsters, pre-historic hipsters didn't need to rely on yoga, hiking or even rock climbing to stay fit...

"There you go bra. Double flat white and homage to Rothko's Seagram series."

Hipster Police Department

"You know what they say: if you're tired of London, you're tired of organic soy latte and pop-up vegan yoga festivals..."

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

"I'm your hip replacement."

'Coffee and Converstion' vs. 'Beer & Bullshit'

GAP. GAP. NO GAP.

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

Hipster Coffee

Rapunzel climbs the tower.