Heavenly Hype Analyst Prints

'You don't really need a halo and wings. It's just a marketing gimmick.'

"We only got six days of funding."

'...We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause..."

"It was better before God took up knitting."

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

'What - NINE whole lives for only ONE eternity?'

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

"I'm just glad we got out before interest rates went up again."

"Surgery up here is free!"

"I thought there would be bacon here."

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

The Adventures of God

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

'It's not for myself, you understand."

'Okay, found you. Now let's open the 'Review' link...'

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

"All we have left is standing room only."

"It's true: no more burpees."

A surprise in heaven

'We've re-branded.'

'I'm being sent back. I told you I have a great attorney.'

"I do tech support for the cloud."

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

"You are running low on cloud storage space. Please upgrade your account to continue."

'I knew if we waited long enough, heaven would downsize.'

"I just know he's gonna ask me why I voted for Trump."

'Looks like somebody needs to lay off of the authentic angel food cake!'

Local News in Heaven

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

"Is this what I want to be doing with my death?"

'Stocks plummeted on news of your demise.'