Healthcare Aficionados T-Shirts

'Four years of medical school and three years of residency, and you come bothering me with the sniffles?'

Give it to me straight, Doc — what's the bottom line?

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

Be Healthy

'There they go - off on their own - and a finer bunch of fledgelings one couldn't ask.'

"When I grow up, I want to go into medicine and help people who can pay out of pocket."

"Daddy, you have to flatten this curve."

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

'What's wrong with me, Doctor?' 'I have no idea! That information comes within doctor-patient confidentiality.'

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

'I asked if you were affiliated with an HMO not a UFO.'

"I hope you don't mind - I'm training a brand-new assistant and I've asked her to check your blood pressure."

"You only need one prescription. The other 7 are for the side effects."

'Fitness guru.'

'Um, can I get a FOURTH opinion?'

"I have to get down to 125 pounds before I go back to my real gym."

"As soon as your dentist gets here, we'll begin."

"I think the 'Exotic Recipe' diet will make me lose weight. I'm running all over town trying to find the ingredients!"

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

'That's the diagnosis of my diagnostic desktop. If you want a second opinion, I'll ask my diagnostic tablet.'

'Wendy! I'm glad you came over! I want you to see my baby's ultrasound hologram!'

'It's a nicotine patch...I've been smoking too much.'

Get well soon!

"Thanks to modern medicine, we now have drugs to make any season the season to be jolly."

'GM apples prevent Migraine'

What will the little one be? Epidemiologist? Virologist? PPE manufacturer?

Healthy Patients Only

"He looks so much like his dad."

'Another day. . . another half dozen medical breakthroughs for us to comprehend. . .'

"Sometimes it helps to turn a question around. Why not you?"

"I hear he's taking an experimental drug called, 'It Ain't Over Till It's Over.'"

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of insurance forms.

"Hey, this anti-depressant you've come up with really works"

Health Nut with a 60-Pack

"We're going to run some tests: bloodwork, a cat-scan and the S.A.T.'s."