Health Issue Empathizer T-Shirts

"My lab tests are in. I'm lactose intolerant."

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

The Golfing Accident

"Have you ever thought of just knocking this 'half-empty glass' OFF the counter?"

'I get the feeling you're wagging your tale on the outside and crying on the inside.'

"Ever get the feeling you're being watched?"

'Long shift?'

Can't even hold signs well.

The Female Brain and The Other One

"We're not laughing at you, sweetie. We're laughing at something you don't understand."

'This is Martins, the office I was telling you about. She's got a real knack for texting people down from window ledges!'

Woman walking into Inner Beauty Salon.

"Cops don't get me. Sure, they got me – but they'll ever get me."

"Matt, you look like you just saw a ghost who fired you!"

Lumberjack and tree share a smile.

"We'll soon have you sorted out, Mr. Fenton."

"Adolescence can be a very trying time, Mr. Alcorn."

"I suggest you take an Empathy pill every day."

'I don't know which health issue should concern me more - the voices in my head or the fact that I need a hearing aid to hear them.'

"Give it to me straight, doc. Will I outlive social security and medicare?"

'How many are just staying together for the kids? Ok, that's good, very good.'

'I think your son is being bullied. He's suffering 80% Chinese wrist burns.'

"This is the time of year when you begin to appreciate the 'Time's' fuller coverage."

STRIP *Community Care * Office rage"

Pregnant woman enters door marked: 'Mommy Time ... With Pre and Post-Natal Hug Therapy'

No safe haven

"Get a hold of yourself, Jerry! We ALL knew the risks we were taking with the new corporate motto. When you care, it's easy to get hurt!"

"I was hoping to settle this without avoiding some sort of argument."

"Now I'm well, I miss my doctor."

"Of course I'm listening to your expression of spiritual suffering. Don't you see me making eye contact, striking an open posture, leaning towards you and nodding emphatically."

'You are a very good doctor. You're actually listening to what I'm saying.'

"You need to stop comparing yourself to other people."

"On a scale of one to ten. How happy would you say you are?"

"How did I get to be the only one that listens?"

'Please, sir -- I appeal to your common humanity!'