Health Goals Pillows

Sam's Gym. My problem is I can't get the body I want with the body I've got!

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

2021

"Good For You / Bad For You"

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

Reach for the Star.

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

What the Doctor Ordered

Lactose Intolerant

'Well, well, well...'

"Your contents have shifted."

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

Mister Mid-Life Crisis

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

We did a biopsy on the mole we removed, and it turns out it was just an old piece of chocolate.

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

Express Barber Chair for Chemo Patients

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."