Health Conscious Hottie Prints

'They contain absolutely no fat, sugar, or sodium -- the downside is, they're just a little bit radioactive.'

'Well, well, well...'

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

Distance to avoid contagion

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

'Look, you're just going to have to cut back. Times have changed. . . Today's kids are full of hydrogenated oils, trans fats, corn syrup, and all kinds of preservatives.'

"I lost 20lbs on my diet. I guess it's time for a relapse."

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

Running

Wash your hands

'Pumpkin pie isn't dessert. It's another vegetable.'

Dating in 2020

"I didn't ask to be made with seventeen grams of fat."

'My mother's resolution is to eat more vegetables, and my resolution is to help her by giving her mine.'

Flash Cuisine

'Our menu is divided into three sections: Cancer causing foods, artery clogging foods, and foods that are being boycotted for political or environmental reasons.'

'You've become run down from working too much. Try sneezing on your boss.'

"She was really disappointed when she found out she was going to an eye doctor and not an iDoctor."

'I'm not feeling well. I think I've got human flu.'

"Here's to us, kid—and the healing powers of raw juices."

Lemonade 5c Sugar Free: 'It sure is!'

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

"Gracie, I think you've made your point. We can't completely remove meat from this family's diet...but we will try very hard to cut back, OK?"

'Is it organic?'

Hiker Followed By Paramedic

'And also, no cigarettes, no cigars, no alcohol,no sweets,no dairy products, no bacon, no ham...'

Spring.

"...and lay off the energy drinks..."

"Scientists have found out that drinking alcohol can be dangerous...well, water can be dangerous, too!"

'I havn't finished last years Marathon yet...'

"Spring is in the air but it's December in my ABS."

"Oh, I listen to my body at meal time, but the messages aren't clear because its mouth is full!"