Head Turner Prints

The Toupee Outlet Store Announces Four New Performance-Enhancing Rugs for Folically-Challenged Male Executives!

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

The Bookworm

'We should buy London and ship it to the States!'

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

'Now then - I just wanted to see how you handle pressure, Mr. Boyle.'

'Okay...3.5 billion in stock, 2.5 billion in cash, 80 million in deferred compensation, my own private jet, a luxury car lease for the next ten years, 3 club memberships and...

'I'm not being punished! I'm reading because I happen to enjoy reading!'

"He's the best our AI recruitment algorithm could fund, unfortunately our AI is really stupid."

Of course I always start off by wooing a prospective candidate with talk of stimulating work,great colleagues and a reasonable work life balance...but the winning argument is always when I promise them enough money to choke a rhino.

"Wow...your resume is quite impressive."

'I'm interested in your job opening, so I'll have my agent give you a ring!'

"Did you hear that that bastard McMinney has buggered of to work for Bank of America!"

"I'm being heavily recruited by several other companies."

"There are those who write books to be read and other who write novels for bookshelves."

Kid to boy in library: 'Oh, we came at the busiest part of the day ... it's a reading frenzy.'

Downloads.

"I'm going to send you to someone who's more familiar with the law of the jungle."

"But what you call a track record I call ancient history."

Ace headhunters.

'It's a difficult position to fill. Someone who's smarter than me - and smart enough to pretend not to know it.'

"HR think we need to look again at your recruitment strategy."

'You're one heck of a corporate head-hunter, Ms. Bridwell.'

"He's writing a novel for the first time in decades. It has less to do with the urge to create or say something new, and more to do with the fact that all his previous books are now out of print."

"No, it's still just a thirst for spaghettios."

Talent, pluck, or plain dumb luck?

Technology and literature

Over enthusiastic headhunter

'I was headhunted.'

This castle manager job better be for real.

Getting the bus back into town from the Bologna Children's Book Fair...

"Hon, I'm taking your advice and starting a new chapter."

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"