Hardware Store Wanderer Pillows

'Oh, we're just here so Rusty can shop around for a new fence to dig under.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

"He's having a hard time finding work."

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

Axle greaseMarine greaseElbow grease .

'Computers' 'Hardware' 'Software'

"Most of my consumerism is self-taught."

'Yeah, truck makers are going vertical instead of horizontal with the extended cabs now. It's the latest trend...'

'Useful Drywall Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Drywall Screws.'

Female nail has been hammered in. Says to male nail: 'Sorry, I have a headache.'

'Do you have any duck tape?'

'I'd like you to meet the saw, the hammer and, well, you know the drill.'

"By the time I've read all the nutrition and ingredients information I've lost my appetite!"

'No, I'm NOT break dancing.'

Dummy no. 5836 was found lying in a pool of his own fake vomit.

Werehouses.

Power and the Glory tools

Car dealer's sign: If you kick the tires, you've bought it!

"Today is catch-your-own day."

"Let's see if I can find you something sexy for Valentine's Day."

'I'm giving my tortoise a white knuckle ride!'

"When it comes to blowing leaves around uselessly and creating an insane amount of noise, this model can't be beat."

Say it with Flowers. Say it with power tools.

STRIP Hambone: Computer Estimates

Nasty Accident.

Gimme 400 rolls of duct tape.

"Why, he's not violent at all, his bolt is too tight."

Food Formerly Sold As Milk/Food Formerly Made with Sugar/Food Formerly Known as Meat/Food Former Fried.

Have you got any nails? I'm on a diet.

'It's going to be all right, sir. Just slow down and tell me how long you've been lost.'

The freight elevator for the man who has everything."

New Jersey's Miracle Mile.

"It's always nice to meet other alumni from Screw U!"