Handy Hero T-Shirts

"Remember, measure twice, cut once, stand baffled, string together obscenities."

"Here's a video showing how to fix a toilet. It shows a guy calling a plumber."

"There's a couple of 'suits' to see you. Oh, and the 'dirty vest and overalls' has finally arrived."

'OK Smith, you can take this back to the Woodwork room now!'

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

Two old superheroes on a park bench feeding the birds.

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

"No more diapers. Simply lift the lid and go here."

"You need to take this thingamajig...and attach it to the whatchamacallit using a turny thing."

Whack-a-molecule

Unable to afford scaffolding, Dave ties plungers on his feet to get up a wall.

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

Lanes Closed for the Hell of It

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

"You must be the newly qualified driver."

The new global mantra flag for the future

Statue of Liberty and Hand Sanitizer

'To grow a good beard, have good dental habits. First, brush with a concave brush to clean the teeth's facial surfaces. Then use a convex brush to reach flat surfaces. Then use a scalloped brush to be chic. Then floss to clean between teeth. Then use ...

"No Hand Sanitiser"

'My purse! The original 24-hour pharmacy.'

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

Say speed

'Why did you get a huge socket wrench set? You never use socket wrenches.'

Make up your mind. Next exit 500 miles.

'How are you doing on your side?'

"You always said nothing would ever come between us."

Dad's Workbench

'I got the job, Mom. You always said I'd make a living with my hands.'

'He can dish it out but can he take it?'

"According to the instructions, if the product is found to be faulty, dispose of it responsibly and purchase another."

'Glass of hot water please, I want to wash the cutlery'

Krest Yellow Strips. (Rat performs dental hygiene.)

John Snow

Way to go

"Ouch!... That hand sanitiser is a bit feisty..."