Habitual Romancer T-Shirts

'Todd, that was the fourth girl named Rachael you broke up with. Stop this Rachael profiling.'

Bear Costume

"You should be sniffed, and often, by someone who knows how."

Say it with flowers

'I think it's damn unprofessional for a dermatologist to scream 'Yikes' like that.'

'Hey, that one looks just like a visible mass of condensed water vapour floating in the atmosphere.'

Say it with flowers: It!

" A lot of it is just legal mumbo-jumbo."

"The finger bowl is courtesy of the gentleman."

'There's more to life than just necking all the time, Frankie!'

"So this is the Mr. Waring who has made such a great impression on my little girl."

'So, you're an organ-grinder's monkey? A professional beggar? Is that how you intend to support my daughter?'

"...and do you agree to accept him as he is, and not try to change him?"

"She just rolled over and started snoring!"

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

Romantic Tree Carving

"Take my hand, my love, and come with me to the cabin, where we can explore each other's naked bodies for ticks."

'Okay, so it's not a violin, but he is playing our song.'

"Mum, Dad... I'd like you to meet my fiance, Goldilocks."

"Oh Gog. . . I wish we could just freeze this moment in time!"

'You and Phil make a great couple. You're perfect for each other!'

"Or...we could suggest a three-way."

BIBLE STORIES, 'This is full of battle and other BOY stuff - not a single romantic comedy!'

"We didn't spend much time together when we first got married, so we're making up for lost time. We now have a date night 300 days a year."

"We can deal with many heart related issues apart from 'a heart torn asunder by the meretricious behavior of a mendacious lover.'"

'Do your lawyers have to be here?'

"This not the way I envisioned falling in love."

Movies through the decades.

Man and woman

"Romeo,Romeo. Are you online,Romeo"

'But you have your own drawer - what greater display of commitment could you want?'

I'm leaning over to kiss Lauren. What're you doing? Possible interruption. Stop live blogging. Girlfriend upset. Can you please tell me what you're thinking? Tune into my blog, woman! Major disconnect.

"Good evening, I'm your date. Let me begin by saying I'm sorry I'm late, I'm sorry I'm bald and I'm sorry I'm short."

Porcupine meets horseshoe crab

Extreme Intimacy.