Gymnastics Giggler T-Shirts

'Nobody likes a show-off, bub!'

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

"They always fall for the old 'high-impact yoga' trick!"

'Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, feel sorry for the people who have to work with you.'

'I'm sorry for laughing Emperor Dorkbutt, it's just that in our language, well...'

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'

We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Weeks ago, the Hubble telescope spotted a rogue planet the size of Venus plummeting through the solar system on a collision course with earth. It turns out it was actually just a prank involving two very bored ISS astronauts and a grapefruit. Breaking News!!!!! Maybe we should send them to Mars after all. One of them seems to have scrawled "Around and around and around and around" all over his space suit, in crayon.

"Two things are infinite: The universe and human stupididy' and I'm not sure about the universe." Albert Einstein. Our colleague and I were going to debate, with me arguing the universe is finite and he's arguing that it's infinite. But he pulled out saying the debate organizers are biased against his position. He didn't believe they were simply advising folks to arrive early when they said "space is limited."

"Oh, oh - looks like a blue shift."

'Millions of billions of trillions of light years away? I could visualise it if you said it in MILES!'

Aliens would have destroyed us years ago if it weren't for our entertainment value.

"Next time your virtual fish dies, please don't try flushing your computer down the toilet."

Black Hole Corks

The Big A** Theory

"After analyzing the energy waves emitted by this pulsar near Andromeda, I believe we have an answer to the age old question: 'Where do jokes come from?'"

Tred carefully mill.

Hockey Goal

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

Astronaut with his Space Dog.

Pommel Horse Poops.

Search for Extraterrestrial Life. Ernie is working on a theory that alien life forms avoid the Milky Way galaxy because they're lactose intolerant.

'Which one's Ringo?'

"On what planet do you imagine this would be funny?"

Stretcher Header.

Obscure Constellations

"Don't they have those gravitational waves at the leisure centre?"

"You're part of the NASA Space Program! Really? I've heard that lame pick-up line sooo many times..."

"It's boring up here. The moon just has no atmosphere."

Smite Golfer or Cow?