Guru Gatherer Pillows

'Shirley MacLaine claims to remember past lives.' 'I thought she looked familiar!'

Tartine

Carmel Buildings, Portman Square: A temperance meeting.

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

Best Before 5th Pint.

At the 2021 Religious Games

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

Life on Earth - The original chat room.

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

Guru.

"welcome man cave."

"Whine and cheezed party."

'Hunting and gathering doesn't sound very interesting, so I have decided to become a consultant.'

Quiz Night...

Rose Toast

Midwest Winter Items.

"I seek enlightenment - and a way to outsource our company's tech support."

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."

'I don't give advice. I'm only up here because it's safer.'

'Wish you wouldn't cut your nails at bedtime!'

"I was a weirdo in this town before anyone even heard of Comic Con."

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

'The trouble is, once you've attained enlightenment, it's all downhill.'

'I warned him about thinking the unthinkable!'

OM, SWEET OM

'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'

"To mediate properly, you need a mantra. How about 'Ka-Ching'?"