Guard Dog Wannabe T-Shirts

'For cryin' out loud. All I said was I thought I heard a noise outside last night!'

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"He's a guard dog."

No Soliciting

Beware of the Dog Hair.

'Yes... but is he a good watch dog?'

'Best watchdog I ever had!'

'That's right...he'll lick you to death.'

"That's just not the real me."

(Beware of the dog)

'He's feeling very proud of himself. He went to watchdog school and graduated 'Magna cum loudly.''

"Turned out he wasn't a miniature."

Beware of Dogs

"He's not here to keep someone from breaking in. He's here to keep students from breaking out!"

An angel in heaven is walking an angel dog.

Beware the Cat

Dog Funerals.

'Hey, where's my dog?'

"Going to the beach with Master is not all that much fun: My job is to guard his stuff while he goes for a swim..."

Make my day.

Rags wanted all the bones all the time.

(Attack Dog) (It's about character stupid!)

'Hopefully I'll grow into the dog...'

"I'm afraid I may have murdered the trees."

'He's always on heightened alert.'

'I was wrong...you can teach an old dog new tricks.'

'But couldn't you leave the ends of the stitches a little shorter...'

'Let's get one thing straight, Bowser, I got you for protection, not companionship.'

'Bless him! Look how proud he looks!'

'Relax! It's you!'

'Do you have any dog food that tastes like dog food?'

"Me being happy to go on these walks is just an act. It's the only way I can get you to stop staring at your computer and come outside."

Seeing Eye Dog at the Optician

'I just heard about this dumb rabies, and I'm terribly worried.'

'Thank you for believing in me.'