Grocery Shopper Pillows

'I'd rather mix it myself. I could use the exercise.'

'I don't understand how our grocery prices have inflated 15% yet you've inflated 25%'

Fish labeling.

Milk prices.

Animal Crackers. It says "Contents may settle." The sheepdog must have herded them all to the bottom of the box.

Animal Crackers. It says, "Expiration date: Cats - Oct., 2017. Dogs - April, 2019. Tortoises - Jan., 2070".

Oranges, lemons and limes.

Breakfast cereal..Healthy option...crap option.

'You'll like this. It has no nutritional value at all.'

'Somebody's lookin' for an extra slap.'

"There's no milk! Where's the milk!"

"I said bring back a tin o'tuna, you big dope!"

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Good For You / Bad For You"

'No Renee, not until you get two degrees, pass a rigorous physical, and beat out thousands of other qualified individuals.'

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

Twenty-first century baby walker

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Important Food Groups

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

"Milk, butter, bread - all past the expiration date. either he just hadn't noticed before, or his time machine worked."

Instant Laundry Detergent, 'Just add water'.

Dad Trophies

"Everything's gone up."

Only 1 calorie per serving: One million servings per can.

Supermarket - World Cup Specials

"Wait, what are you doing?"

Only One Item or Fewer.

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

'I love this supermarket; they have the easiest to understand wine department.'

'Diet considerations.'