Green Portfolio Enthusiast T-Shirts

Investments: Yes, we have organic, local & cruelty-free stocks.

'The bad news is it's all our client's money.'

Putting money back in to the world economy

The Economy Discovers FFF!

Climate Crisis and the Banks

Flooding Review - 'We're holding you responsible...'

"You can take it with you down here - but no social conscience funds."

'But on the plus side, I felt better about owning a SUV as soon as I bought some oil stocks.'

'It'll help the economy and the environment, Mr. President -- biodegradable money!'

"I only invest in alternative meat products, so I reject the terms 'Bull' and 'Bear'."

"In view of climate change, I'd put all my money into ice cream, mineral water and weapons!"

'Reindeer must now be fitted with the government approved CZ1 catalytic converter to reduce methane emissions.'

"The good news is we'll be dead before our way of life kills us!"

'I'm doing my bit got the planet by investing in biofuels. . . Mind you, the fact that they'll have to strip-mine South America for crop space may well put a few noses out of joint.'

"I am a climate change denialist...I have attempted to sue the EPA thirteen times and I fought the Clean Water Act!"

'They're the angel of social conscience funds and his evil twin, greedy devil.'

Money feeds tree of property

Global Climate Change Response.

'The Dow is going up, the Dow is going down, the Dow is...'

Green Bank

'Your wealth is no longer on paper. It's in cyberspace.'

Golfer Snooker.

"Man is the master of this planet, and nature has to adapt to economic concerns!"

'Do this is the 'Green' everyone is hyping in 'Go Green'?'

Carbon suicide

Holistic Stocks, Inc.

"It just appeared after I'd transferred my portfolio into ethical investments."

"Excuse me. Everyone is curious about how you managed to take it with you."

"Look at all that stock market green, and tell me if we're making it a greener planet."

Investments: 'We now offer 'social conscience' funds and 'corporate ethics' funds'.

'Of course I'm happy to give you an estimate of our fees, as long as you realise it will be nowhere near how much it will cost you.'

'Can he call you back? He's viewing his favourite internet site.'

Ethical investment - piggy bank

"We explained to the Minister that pension management fees were incredibly complex..."

"Ho Ho Ho Hoax!"