Graph Genius T-Shirts

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

Graph.

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

If nobody had invented graphics

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

"Actual results indicate that the statistical analysis of the data which projections were based on may have been wrong."

'You'll be happy to see that I've finally managed to turn things around.'

"Peterson proposes we move out of the mountains."

"Right, before we look at the covid figures for today, do we need another sheet of paper?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'Maybe the reason we don't have those 'off the chart' sales anymore is because our charts are too big.'

ACME Balloon Company.

Let's Celebrate

"We've done a rigorous examination of your business plan using the latest algorithms to model future profits. . . which way up would you like it?"

"It's called geometry, Mum."

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

He then drew a number of smaller pie charts behind the bigger chart. That helped to put it into perspective.

Sales chart plummets into employees head.

"At least we are consistently inconsistent."

'Now this is my kind of green!'

Sales.

"Thank you, Harris - I get the picture."

'We must grasp this new opportunity'

'Brains...brains...brains...'

"The disasters are collaborating better than we are!"