Grandmas T-Shirts

"I said, remind me to tahnk your mother for giving Jimmy the drum for Christmas!"

"I don't want to go to grandma's, she only has 3G."

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

City Zoo: Day Care

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Bond James, Bond."

"In high school, I was quite the star in metal shop."

Prize vegetables.

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

The Busy Gardener

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

'Boy, the fish are really biting today, aren't they, Fred?'

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

"No, it wasn't a sinkhole. Your old TV was so heavy the ground could no longer take the weight."

I like the Jets...I guess

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

"His first out-of-body experience."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

"They grow up so fast."

The Zoo.