Grandma's Little Helper Gifts

Grandma wearing novelty T-Shirt: 'How's my Hungging?'

'Okay mum, I'll eat it all up. But I doubt I'll grow big and strong on this muck!'

'Here comes your Daddy - Do you want me to do the talking?'

Child doing the washing up

'I'm sorry Peggy, but at this point in time, I just don't feel like getting off the couch.'

"Welcome to the Short Staffed Cafe serving food like your grandma cooked. Is your grandma busy? We really need a cook."

A boxing match between Apple Brown Betty and Apple Pan Dowdy

"She used to just be a mom, but when I was born she was promoted to grandma."

The journey of life

Little girl standing infront of mummy's dressing table putting tennis balls up her top

"I heard you were out of flower, Mommy."

'I'm sorry, we did all we could, but she had a severe case of curiosity.'

'I know for a fact my grandma never used propylene glycol monoesters, polysorbates, sorbitan monostearate and di-glycerides.'

"If you promise to be very careful, Mommy will let you carry the baguettes."

We're sunk. Everyone's supposed to bring their Grandma's best dish to the potluck. Don't panic. Helen's Grandma was from Scotland. Yeah. But the Patakis cook Indian feasts. And the Mercantis still make 10 course Italian dinners. What was your Granny's specialty? Jell-o cube salad. Mmm ... sweet or savory?

"There she is! The Holy Bubbha!"

'Boy, Grandmas sure are cute at that age.'

'I may not look like much but f**k with me and you're dead!'

Osteo-pierogies

"Phew! I'm bushed! I've been up all night helping the removal men clear the front room."

'Mom! Grandma is sneaking a smoke again!'

"This is great, Mavis! Let's have another go!"

"Yes it is amazing you found a card with GOTH on it, Gran, especially with your eyesight."

"Hi, Mom, just popped by to see what you were doing."

"Oh, I'm just between naps, Grandma."

'Granny's got wind again!'

'These aren't the rewards of the home gardener. These are vegetables!'

I don't think Grandma likes my snake.