Grammar Wizard Pillows

Future Tents

"The apostrophe goes before the s..."

"You don't need pronouns in your presentation. That's what finger-pointing is for."

A Puppet Named Juan

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

Thru versus Through Traffic

I will study my speling words...

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

Punctuation Police

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

A Copy Editor and His Dog

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

Someone who knows apostrophes

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

'The Questioner'

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

"My report to the board was perfect. They did not understand a word of it and now think I'm smarter than them."

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

"I try to write a little bit every day."

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

'Who teaches apostrophe usage?'