Graduating English Class T-Shirts

'Please Miss, why does 'Earl's Court' have an apostrophe but 'barons Court' doesn't?'

Big Bang Theory.

"I'm going to talk about the summer before last, it was much more fun."

"You've got to learn about verbs. How else are you going to verbalize your feelings?

Math Major Pennants. ISOSCELES. SCALENE EQUILATERAL.

My book report is based on the audio book of the same name.

Four Types of Test-Takers...

A resourceful girl, Cynthia hoped to get credit in both Earth Sciences and Culinary Arts with her ozone layer cake.

I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not talk in art class. I will not in art class. I will not talk in art class.

"The little engine that could... after taking advantage of family connections, a trust fund, working two years for free as an intern, and finally getting hired as an independent contractor."

'And what part of the formula don't you understand?'

Philosophy Department: You are here but why are you here?

A prince needs to learn arithmetic because some day you may want to divide and conquer.

'Our goal is to stress di-versity while remaining a uni-versity.'

I need to set upmy own company.

'You don't have to worry about my future any more -- I just downloaded an entire college education!'

'Teens are like trees, you can chart their growth by the number of rings.'

'When they came up with a 'do your homework' app, then I'll know technology can really make life better.'

"This is what's known as a book."

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

'If you're not confused then you realy don't know what's going on... !'

'As everyone knows, scientists are at their peaks early in their careers.'

'This course in philosophy is not designed to teach you how to make a living. I will be teaching you how to make a life.'

'The first exam was easy as ABC, but that one felt more like a D,E or F.'

CHAUCER 411, 'Boy -- that guy spells worse than I do!'

Dictionary. It's a cordless spell checker!

'I meant a book report on 'Treasure Island,' not a report on the Muppet movie version.'

"Before you grade my test, keep in mind, my dream is to become a wealthy doctor, just like my available father"

"I just take Tommy's computer here and hit delete. I haven't eaten homework in years!"

Student - Haven't emailed in 2 days.

On the cusp of winning the Nobel, Bernie gets exposed by his third grade handwriting teacher.

'...Or not.'

"My paper is on Paul Revere's famous ride form the standpoint of media impact across select stages of the colonial decision-making process."

University of xylongatnyfexodyl never heard of it

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'