Graduate School Acceptance Pillows

Graduate School: That's right,,,You're STILL here,

'This isn't a good time. I'm in trouble with the Dean for using my cell phone in class. I'll call you back.'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

'Our admission policy is now simplicity itself. If you have the tuition, you're in.'

The MBA Draft

Postgraduates A group of posts on their way to class.

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

'Another football scholarship offer?'

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

"You know what happens when you make good grades? They send you to another school called college."

My new laptop is nicer than your new laptop. I'm not going to get into a competition about whose new laptop is nicer. The one I replaced is nicer than the one you replaced. Stop it.

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

'It's time to move out when Mom says...'

'Unemployed math grad. Will solve quadratic equations for food."

Personnel. I've heard of "magna cum laude" and "summa cum laude," but I've never heard of a person graduating "persona non grata." (Published originally on June 3, 1981.)

'As everyone knows, scientists are at their peaks early in their careers.'

Through These Hallowed Halls, walks Our Future - "Talk about putting pressure on a guy!"

'The bad news is you failed all your courses. The good news is you passed the urine test.'

"Where am I going to college? I thought this was college."

'It's my application to Harvard...'

"Class, this is Mr. Elzondo. He's going to talk about going to college."

Yahoo! What's that about? She got into the college of her choice. Which college is it? Not sure. She chose to apply to 37. West Fester High School.

"No, I'm not the first in my family to attend college. But I am the first at an Ivy."

'Does it matter what answer I put down? After all, this is Liberal Arts.'

Treadway college - A little knowledge, a lot of tuition.

Pinara fund

Scenes we'd most like to see...

"Stop applying! You've been accepted to three universities!"

College game crowd: 'WE WON',,,'and that somehow makes you superior'

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

'Cat Lit. You?'