Graduate Of The Great Unknown Pillows

'I would have come to you sooner, but you hadn't graduated from medical school yet.'

"Congratulations, Amruk. You prove they do exist."

'But Dad, all the other kids get a roth IRA as part of their allowance package.'

'It says I missed freshmen Orientation and I have to take it in summer school in order to graduate.'

The Lost World: You are Here

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"The teacher expects too much of me. She wants me to give it the old college try, and I'm only in grade school."

"I'll go to my room and do my homework, but I want time and a half."

"So much for password protected."

'You will now be presented with your degrees. That is, of course, after you jump through another one of our little hoops.'

"We've decided to diversify our funds on some candy!"

Good Luck with your finals.

'I've crunched the numbers and you can afford to increase my allowance by 15.5%.'

Day one, post grad

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

Believing that clothes make the man, Dave goes for the 'smart guy' look.

'I can't afford to absorb the overhead anymore!'

Yonder

'But Marvin, you can't be a college graduate for a living!'

'F.G.G. First Grade Graduate.'

"I think you should provide a 401(k) with my allowance."

'I got that, Ms. Rafferty... now can we get on to student loans?'

"Would you like a glass too? They're five bucks."

"Dad, now can I be a fireman?"

'I already know about the birds and the bees. Tell me about investing my allowance for capital appreciation.'

'This isn't the dollar I deposited!'

'Sixty percent of my income is from newspaper delivery, 20% from odd jobs, and 20% from allowance.'

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks-- When do I get paid'

The unknown soldier: war grave.

Newly Qualified Teacher.

"But it's helping me learn my math!"

"Promoted to Grade 1. That's it? No swag?"

'Tut. Now I suppose we'll have to hear all about her holiday!'

"It'll be signed after your student loans are repaid."

School of Fish