Gossiping Friend Prints

'The only time he works up a sweat is running to the dinner table...'

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

Annual run-off at the mouth.

'She's so put together!'

A little bird told me...

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

'Yak, yak, yak.'

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"Whine and cheezed party."

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

"Our next contestant is Mildred and her specialist subject is "Other People's Business""

JET (Part I)

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

"Botox."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

"Well, at first I didn't like him. But then his creepiness just grew on me."

“Rumor has it, it’s happy hour.”

"She's got money and he's a 'poet'."

"George is fluent in two languages. English and total nonsense."

Weditorials

'Social media makes things so much easier to be a gossip."

'Botox...'

"Boss, remember when you told me to start charging Sadie 'studio fees' for operating her radio show in the cafe?" "Well, I've got good news and bad news." "What's the good?" "She's agreed not to resort to violence." "I see. And the bad news?" "On today's 'Sadie Cohen Radio Show': Evil cafe owners who may or may not poison their customers."

"He's only an associate but he's already reaping at a partner's level."

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."

"He's a real throwback. He does all his own publicity stunts."

'I wish there was some way we could reduce emissions here.'

"Remember that lovely couple of scarlet macaws we met in Puerto Jiménez? They split up!"