Gossip Reader Gifts

Have you noticed how chefs have replaced hairdressers in the social pages?

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

'She's so put together!'

Annual run-off at the mouth.

A little bird told me...

'Yak, yak, yak.'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

Men gossiping

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

'It's a fake - but all the hanging around the water cooler is down 57%!'

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'

"If you have any gossip, tell me now - she could come back ay second."

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

JET (Part I)

"Well, Mr. Goddam Fancy-Pants Small-Town-Expose hot shot! What makes you think we don't all have lusty, kiss-and-tell memoirs boiling away inside us?"

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

"Our next contestant is Mildred and her specialist subject is "Other People's Business""

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

"Can you keep a secret?"

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

"Water cooler talk stations."

'Who's a pretty boy! Is that all you've got to say?'

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."

'Dear Miss Etiquette, I'm never sure if I should say anything...'

"He's only an associate but he's already reaping at a partner's level."

"She's got money and he's a 'poet'."

"Here they come: Detox and Botox."