Gossip Girl Gifts

"She's had work."

"This is a night for white wine."

"He has the rough outline of a good body but none of the details."

"On the bright side, he's a very sexy couples therapist."

"I'll take three dozen bottles."

"Half and half?"

"Ugh! Here comes WIlliam Tell and overtures."

'Do you know what men and pantyhose have in common? They both run, cling, or don't fit properly.'

'Most of our arguments have had something to do with wallpaper patterns.'

"Take no notice. It's just Norman being sarcastic again."

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

Annual run-off at the mouth.

'Yak, yak, yak.'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

Men gossiping

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

'It's a fake - but all the hanging around the water cooler is down 57%!'

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

"If you have any gossip, tell me now - she could come back ay second."

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

"Can you keep a secret?"

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

"Water cooler talk stations."

"Botox."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'