Golden Retriever Admirer Pillows

"You want something retrieved? You've come to the right place!"

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

"He was a very good boy."

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

"Now I really hate poetry."

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

'He does lack social skills.'

I'm not saying I'm not a hound dog. I'm saying I'm not nothing but a hound dog.

'Sure, it's our pool. . . but who's going to tell him that?'

A Golden Non-Retriever

Why Cupid is not allowed to drink alcohol anymore...

"It's great to see Biff; Socksie the cat is out of the bag..."

'Yes, it's just a little volume.'

"That's the preacher's dog."

"Meow"

'Well, they're just great for running down gazelles and jackals!'

No, I don

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

'Please keep in mind this is only a 'ruff' copy.'

There are no rats with collars...

"We should get out to the country more often."

Dogs are smart enough to understand human commands. Cats are smart enough to ignore them.

Fifty Shades of Gray

"Don't tell anyone, but some of my best cartoons are about cats."

Flea Philosophy.

"I watched a Lassie marathon today and realized that I really need to step up my game."

Hyenas as Pets

Dogs and Chickens

"Okay, who's purring?"

Pet owner hanging Obedience School diploma

'Oh, sure -- but He won't let US have pets!'

It's for you.

"Wow, these are good!"

"I love it!"

"They were bred originally to be hors d'oeuvres."