Going To The Pub T-Shirts

Ring! That's the bar phone. Are you here? Oh, I forgot: you're always here.

'Rabid dog,' 'Relax, we've been for a pint,'

'You won't let me go down the pub at night. . . now you won't let me have my friends round.'

'I thought it was your round.' 'It was, but I'm trying to get in touch with my feminine side.'

It's a living.

'The wife's leaving me unless I stop drinking - so keep 'em coming lanlord!'

"This bird-fancier's objects of affection all work in pubs."

Warning: the following rugby match may contain course language, adult themes...

"Fire! Quick, get something to put it out with!"

"That's right -- rub it in!"

5-6 Happy Hour. . . 6-7 Letdown Hour.

"Don't even think about sneaking off to the pub tonight."

Beers

"Work was brutal. I'll be home later."

"This place has the best happy hour."

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"It feels good to unwind..."

'Of course I'm out of touch with reality. That's what I came here for.'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

Check your universal remote control at the door.

Best Before 5th Pint.

You said you wanted beer with hops !

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

"What other tricks does he need?"

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

"So you're anthropomorphic too? It's a small world."

Buy one beer, get one free. If I may paraphrase a famous quote, "Beer is proof that God has mixed feelings about us and wants us to be hungover."

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

'-Not THE Queen Vic?'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

"Well, what are you doing after the millennium?"

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

If bar stools were like playground swings...

'All this talk about a consumer society... I don't buy it.'

'Half o' mild and a bag of pork scratchings - you're grooming me, aren't you?'