Globetrotters T-Shirts

"New York are at Lunch, Munich are at Coffee and Tokyo are at Lunch."

'Where are the four corners of the earth?'

'We'd just like to get away from all leading economic indicators for a while.'

A gawp of tourists

'I'm a just-in-time imports/exports executive - I should've gone home Tuesday week!'

"I'm sorry--I meant to say 'island paradise,' not 'soft target'"

"Your luggage has gone to hell."

'Been there, done that' travel agency. Serving the seriously jaded tourist since 1995.

'Do you have a flight that will get us to Gate 2?'

"Well that's just great!! I guess we really are flightless birds now!!"

"Have you been waiting here long?"

Transport strike

Tourism Tax

"Hi, scheduling? I might be a little late. I'm stuck in traffic."

"Seriously, I'm not lost: I'm a travel writer..."

"I'm sorry, sir, but that country has been wiped out by runaway debt."

"You're looking at an endangered species, son."

Couple putting baby through the scanner.

Technological Dependence.

"Hi, it's us, Sue and Dave, from the Tenerife in '4. You said we were welcome to come and stay anytime."

More Indians holidaying in Australia.

'Why isn't there zero tolerance to drugs and alcohol?'

"Sir, you've been downgraded to the baggage compartment."

"I never thought I'd say this, but I kinda miss people."

'We'd like to go to a country not under threat of US attack for having a nuclear weapons program.'

'That should say 'Have you anything left?''

'There's nothing worse than being a bird that gets airsick.'

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.

'I could use a change of scenery. Let's fly to Cape Cod.'

Someone's pulled the plug on Venice

Restaurant EGYPT

'Just a minute. Aren't you supposed to pull the other way?'

'We would like to tour the great clothing manufacturers of China!'

'Travel really opens the mind...I'd never seen such despair, such desperation, people who've lost ALL hope...and that was just at Heathrow!'

Egalitarianism in India