Gizmo Giggler Prints

Women have been paying more attention to me since I was reconfigured to resemble an ATM!

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

E-vac-u-ate! E-vac-u-ate! . . . I've just farted. . ."

That's all very well sir, but is it full strength, low fat, high calcium or soy?

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

"Are you trying to show contempt for this court."

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

'I'm sorry for laughing Emperor Dorkbutt, it's just that in our language, well...'

'If Batman can have a batmobile why can't a snowman...'

"Oh, oh - looks like a blue shift."

'Millions of billions of trillions of light years away? I could visualise it if you said it in MILES!'

Aliens would have destroyed us years ago if it weren't for our entertainment value.

We interrupt today's "The Price is Right" episode to bring you breaking news … Weeks ago, the Hubble telescope spotted a rogue planet the size of Venus plummeting through the solar system on a collision course with earth. It turns out it was actually just a prank involving two very bored ISS astronauts and a grapefruit. Breaking News!!!!! Maybe we should send them to Mars after all. One of them seems to have scrawled "Around and around and around and around" all over his space suit, in crayon.

"Two things are infinite: The universe and human stupididy' and I'm not sure about the universe." Albert Einstein. Our colleague and I were going to debate, with me arguing the universe is finite and he's arguing that it's infinite. But he pulled out saying the debate organizers are biased against his position. He didn't believe they were simply advising folks to arrive early when they said "space is limited."

"It's a smart toaster. If you can't figure it out, press the 'Dumb It Down' button."

Black Hole Corks

"After analyzing the energy waves emitted by this pulsar near Andromeda, I believe we have an answer to the age old question: 'Where do jokes come from?'"

Search for Extraterrestrial Life. Ernie is working on a theory that alien life forms avoid the Milky Way galaxy because they're lactose intolerant.

Astronaut with his Space Dog.

Virtual chicken crossing the road.

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

The Big A** Theory

'Finally some good news about out new vitamin pill!'

"Sorry Brian, bit of a rush this morning - I've left my face in the car."

Tred carefully mill.

'Which one's Ringo?'

"On what planet do you imagine this would be funny?"

STRIP Hambone: Computer health analysis

"Captain...I'm detecting Hemorrhoids off our starboard bow."

"It's boring up here. The moon just has no atmosphere."