Gig Attendee T-Shirts

"I couldn't actually see the band but here's a photo of them on the person in front of me's phone."

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Sloaney Pony.

Rhapsody in Blue.

Concert Pianist.

EWE 2.

George Michael

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

"This next one is my own quirky rendition of Berlioz's 'Symphonie Fantastique,' Movement 5, 'Dream of a Witches' Sabbath.'"

'I'm sorry I missed your recital. Daddy was on the phone with his broker, checking on bond yields. It's another form of bonding, son.'

Elvis Presley

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

Italica

Man at penthouse party walks out onto terrace and is startled to see the Earth, instead of the moon, shining in the sky.

Jarvis Cocker

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

"Free Bird!"

Hey, I think I found something. Heavy metal detector.

Eric Clapton.

Johannes Sebastian Bach

"The last time I heard a beat like this I was at a Grateful Dead concert."

'I've got two tickets to Handel's Messiah -- What time do you get off work?'

All dressed up and no place to go

'It states in his will that if he becomes brain dead he wants to go unplugged.'

Six jazz instruments.

Liam Gallagher.

"The guy who wrote 'The Frog Chorus' is sounding kinda croaky."

Young boy thinks he's spotted an old rocker.

"Oh, yes - BEAUTIFUL singer he was - but could he snap his fingers. . ?"

Super Bowl Halftime Show Barbra Streisand reads from her memoir.

"This next one's called 'Song for Me'."

Jimi Hendrix.

"Thank you! That last tune took some fancy fingerpickin'. Apologies to those in the front who may have gotten a press - on nail or two in their drink."

Songbird.

Jeff Beck.