Gifts For Girlfriend Pillows

Man claims to be a good swimmer so lady asks him to jump in the river and fetch a flower

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

"I said I'd give you the world, didn't I?"

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

The wife whisperer.

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

Christmas Presents.

'It must be good chocolate for six bucks a box.'

Santa called but you were out!

'Too pricey? Perhaps you wish to see something in macaroni and spray paint?'

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

'As a token of friendship we present to you this sacred albino fawn.' 'We sailed all the way across the Atlantic Ocean, and all you have is light deer?!'

CEO.

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

Tipping Pain Chart

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

'They were all out of roses.'

A centipede's Christmas stockings

'And that,and that,and that...'

"That's $20 for you if you pluck the tail feathers off my rival over there..."

C'mon, help me out! Which rock do you think my kids would like better?

Happy Valentine's.

'Awww, isn't that nice: This one says 'PS: Love to Rudolph!''

Valentines Day truck