Getting A Stair Lift T-Shirts

"You only started bringing me home from the Darby and Joan club because I had a stair life and you couldn't manage stairs any more."

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

The Corporate Ladder and the Corporate Elevator.

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozak.

Ski lift mobile

Corporate Ladder and Corporate Elevator

Offices moved to 23rd floor - taking the company to new heights - the management.

"I can see you're a ski newbie."

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

'That's right, we're going all the way to the top floor ... I'm late for a meeting!'

Going Down?

Thumbing a Lift.

"This IS my day-to-night outfit"

"This condo includes free access to fitness facilities...7 flights of stairs."

Elevator charge $1.00.

'Not only did they install an elevator to help you get over the dam, they also hired an elevator operator.'

"It's not that I'm lazy. But I envisage myself not so much climbing the corporate ladder, as taking the corporate elevator."

The guy who got in on the ground floor

A businessman waits for an elevator; on his briefcase are two stickers reading "Up" and "Down".

"I considered riding my bike to work until I realized it involved pedaling and sweat."

"Can you at least pretend to try and hold the elevator so I won't mull over and over how you didn't hold the elevator."

A Fork-lift.

"This thing is so slow!"

Chatty, garlic-coffee breath, apathetic, contagious

'Going up?'

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

Dead Scientists Climbs DNA Stairway to Heaven.

"Do we look like we're going up?"

"It was one of the things they kept after selling the ski resort."

Balloon ski lift

"Last one to the top's a geriatric."

Mountain escalator.

'You can't use the elevator as guestroom!'

Elevator. Up, down and dirty.

"What does it look like? I'm running a little late this morning."