Gerontology Admirer T-Shirts

'170 years old - and they look that age from day one!'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

The Age of Reptiles. . .

Ed's receding hairline!

"Wish I could do that." "Better give him a dog treat and a bath first."

"At a certain point, I bring them back."

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

'Do I remember pre-decimal coinage?I remember pre-Tudor coinage!'

'It looks like you're suffering from TMB... too many birthdays...'

'Great news, Methuselah Tests show you'll live to be 100!'

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

"Some day, son, all these aches and pains will be yours."

'If I knew it would mean all these hospital appointments, I'd never have got old!'

"You'll see - when you get older, parts start to sag."

"He's one hundred and five years old and I think it's disgusting!"

Gerontologist on the phone - 'Oh, you know ... same old, same old ... and how are things with you?'

Boy throws a stick for a tortoise. By the time the tortoise returns, the boy is an old man.

An old woman measuring the decreasing height of an old man using a height chart

Middle Age - The Magazine For You - Yeah, You!

"See, the problem with doing things to prolong your life is that all the extra years come at the end, when you're old."

'The bad news is you've lived well beyond your expiration date.'

"...At what point do hemorrhoids become 'just another hobby?'"

"When did I change from seizing the day to just seething?"

Fortune teller sits beneath a sign 'Wrinkles Read Here'

'Why John, I remember you when you were this high.'

Toxic Relationship

"This is your great-great-great-great grandfather Felipe. If he was alive, he'd be a very famous man."

'I'm middle aged.' 'You'll grow out of it!'

'I'm doing a school report on 'the aging process,' Dad -- can I interview you?'