Gentle Giant Sympathizer Pillows

"I hurt a lot of people during my last twelve steps."

'I can't control my anger when people get too close to my kids...'

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

"The government doesn't understand me."

"It's a pizza leaflet..."

"Delivery."

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

'One thing, however - if they DO bite you, you don't suffer!'

"I thought they only used the ink for protection..."

'I wanted to hear the pita pata of tiny feet so he bought me a hamster.'

'Oh, he's just my son here for bring your kid to work day.'

'If you can hear me, Larry Gligstein, please send a text to 555-703-7193

"Who the hell keeps doing that?"

"I love you, ya big galoot."

'I realize working in the Complaints Department can be tough. But it must be a thrill to work with the public on a daily basis.'

'The Giants vs. Trolls'

Leave Only Footprints, Take Only Photos.

"I taught him to shake hands, and now he's running for congress!"

"Stop trying to change me!!"

'Be gentle with me it's my first time!'

"The champagne aisle always makes me cry. Just look at all this imprisoned happiness!"

"I don't want to rush things. Instead of hugging, why don't we just hold hands?"

And with this turn of events, Scooter and Huck began to consider other forms of recreation... softball, perhaps.

Big man scared at the dentist's.

"For the last time, it's Flo before Fie except after Fee."

"If you're going to be my accountant, you need to know that you'l be dealing with some big numbers."

The St. Bernard mastiff. A happy dog - rather!

Man to complaints clerk: 'My dog just died and I think my wife's cheating on me.'

"So...you have a boyfriend?"

"His reputation as a tough guy was dented when his Valentine called him ‘cuddle bottom’."