Gender Rights Supporter Gifts

Mr. Hillary Clinton

Unemployment .

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

International Women's Day.

"I've never said this to a woman before, but here goes: We're not paying you enough."

"I've just never worked anyplace where the 'alpha male' was a woman."

She was warned. Nethertheless she persisted.

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

"The company is very keen on diversity, could you reapply as a woman?"

'If no man is an island, then what the hell is no woman?'

Government a la Carte

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

Glass Ceiling

All Hail the Matriarchy

'You say you type 80 words a minute ... Actually, that's not at all important...!'

"Typical company, I'm the only woman!!"

"All those years of diversity training, seminars and research papers to shred the idea of male superiority....When all we really needed...was for them to train like the Lionesses for 20 minutes."

His Hers Pers Vis Xyrs Hirs TBD

'It's not fair. Women doing the same job I'm doing in this office are being paid more than I am!'

"And to think all these years you've worried about some boy wonder taking over your job."

'We used to be a patriarchy, but lately we've been more goddess-centric.'

'...she still can't manage a decent sports metaphor.'

'I don't get it, Victoria. . . why are men in control of everything?'

What must every 5 paragraph essay contain? 5 paragraphs! For the last 18 years, some wise guy says that as if no one's heard it before. Congratulations. Who was this year's Mr. Predictable? You're wrong, Mr. K. A girl said it. Wow! Another triumph for women's equality in my classroom.

Men Win Again

'When you look at me do you see a woman or a senior partner?'

"We don't pay you less because you're a woman.. we pay you less because we're men!"

"It's all significantly less impressive once you realize these guys had free child care."

'Yes, it has the organs of both sexes. . . a penis and a brain.'

Tucker Ratings Gold

International Women's Day

"No, Mr. Kurlander, I don't have, nor have I ever had, a recipe for cranberry muffins."

'You want a nurse present? -- Are you discriminating against me because of my gender?'

"You'll go far...you think like a man..."

"I don'y know about you guys, but I don't feel like I've lost one goddamn bit of my feminity."