Gathering Enthusiasts Gifts

They get together, feel sorry for themselves, and eat a spreadable meat concoction. It's a pit, pate party!

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

'I'm sorry, but everyone is in a meeting.'

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

Ralph spent his Sundays in the park gathering nuts.

'Before we start, shall we go round the table, and each share our name and a horrible dark secret from our past.'

"That's six 'noes' and one 'aye', the ayes have it"

"At least we are consistently inconsistent."

'This prediction has a margin of error of plus or minus fifteen...fifteen class-action suits brought against the company.'

'Anyone who opposes the plan I'm about to propose please signify by saying 'I resign.''

'Congratulations, Yomp - we're giving you a bigger carrot!'

The Epsom Derby - The Finishing Line

'Ms. Snack, prepare the conference room for an executive sting.'

"And, while there's no reason yet to panic, I think it only prudent that we make preparations to panic."

Responsibility and duties

'We need to change the introduction to our annual report. What's another word for bankrupt?'

Rose Toast

"Unlike other companies, we are going to take the high road through this rough time, even if, at some point, we're obliged to raid the employee pension fund! Is everybody clear on that?"

"Next meeting back to paper. Everyone missed doodle."

Conference Pears

'Thanks for flying in for the meeting.'

"That's Arnie, our resident meeting moth. He doesn't have an office... Just flits all day from one meeting to another. And be careful: he's got a thing for wool!"

EXTROVERTS ANONYMOUS

'I meet therefore I MANAGE.'

Mass Travel

"Not the most impressive strategic plan I've ever seen."

'Who's pumped about this meeting?!'

'That's it gentlemen, we're broke. Anybody know any good jokes?'

The Sky Is The Limit

"We could hire another accountant and secretary, but wouldn't it be fun to have a barista?"

Agreeable Noises

"I just wonder if there aren't some team members who could be a bit more focused in meetings."