Gastropubs Pillows

"So, that was a gastropub...well, the were right about the gas part!"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

"I love this place—its food, its ambience, and its political goals."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"The fish sticks here are very good."

'A cheeky red?'

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

T-Bones STEAK House...NO sissy salad bar!...Heimlich expert always on duty'

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

"Are your eel rolls electric?"

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

La Table

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

Today's special... donuts.

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."