Gastronomy Geeks T-Shirts

"But if you leave New Orleans, you'll be just another sandwich."

'My escargot has escargone.'

Come dine with me!

Counting ribs

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

'This might be the common ground we've been looking for.'

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

La Table

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

Try to guess the continent dining...

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

View to the Future

"Vindaloo hot enough?"

"Oh, look- French! Let's try it."

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

Before/After

Important Food Groups

Menu Dating

The Main Types of Cheese

"This is our soft opening."

'Perhaps sir would like the dessert menu?'

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"Waiter, there's a weapon of mass destruction in my soup!"

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"